I am very confused about my blue-front Amazon, Mr P. I have had him for two years. I clean his cage, feed him and take him every where possible with me, always looking for new things for him to eat and explore and play with.

Mr. P has lots of freedom; could this be the problem? It’s a drama every time I feed him. We can’t go on like this. Please advise.

--Pam Charlton

Some people would say that Mr. P. simply prefers men to women. I have seen many parrots with a personal preference for one gender. However, from your letter it sounds as if Mr. P was fine with you for quite some time.

For this reason I suspect the problem may lie with an experience, not a preference.

People naturally want their parrots (and other pets) to appreciate the attention and care they give them. Of course, it rarely works that way.

It is very likely that Mr. P. takes you for granted and has little or no regard for your valiant efforts to provide the best environment possible.

Parrots live in the here and now. They may remember past experiences, but only in conjunction with survival, breeding and other basic instincts. What’s more, negative experiences seem to shape their attitude toward owners more quickly than the many positive things we do for them.

To begin working on developing a more positive relationship with Mr. P., start by avoiding the misconception that you need to be his boss. This strategy may work for a dog, but is a difficult concept for a parrot to grasp.

Mr. P.’s instincts tell him to bond with another individual, but they also guide him toward positive experiences, not negative ones. If you try to force him to do something he doesn’t like, he may withdraw.

In reevaluating your relationship with Mr. P., think back on all your interactions with him and note anything that might ruffle his feathers. I suspect there are plenty of things you might do on a daily basis that he might feel unsure about.

Something as simple as changing the papers in Mr. P.'s cage can cause negative feelings if he is protecting it as his territory. Limiting the bird’s exploration of an area or a certain object, or taking him off your shoulder and putting him back into his cage-any one of these things could rub him wrong.

Be everything positive to him and avoid making him do anything he doesn't want to do. Find ways to "let" him do what you want him to do. Use treats and rewards of his favorite food items to encourage him to go back into his cage at night.

Do not let him wander into areas from which you may have trouble retrieving him. And last, see if your husband will take a back seat to you as you work on your relationship with Mr. P. If your husband does not handle him for a while, Mr. P will be more likely to shift his attraction to you.

You mentioned you take Mr. P everywhere you can. Some birds like going for a walk or a ride in the car. However, some nervous birds would much rather remain in the comfort and security of familiar surroundings.

It can be very difficult to tell if a parrot actually likes an experience or if he’s simply coping. But one clue is body language. If Mr. P likes your road trips, he should show some typical signs of enjoyment.

One sure sign is happy vocalizing. This might include words or phrases the bird has learned, or relaxed contact calls. If he’s nervous, he might softly growl, call anxiously, or in extreme cases, shriek.

A happy bird will look and move in the direction you’re traveling and be curious about objects he sees along the way.

A nervous bird may withdraw to the bottom of the cage, look in the opposite direction, or glance quickly from side to side as if he looking for an escape route.

The attitude of his feathers is also important to note. Nervous birds keep their feathers flat against the head and body. Comfortable birds hold their feathers slightly open and away from the head and body.

You have a bit of a challenge ahead of you. However, with patience and positive reinforcement, you may be able to reestablish the relationship you once had with Mr. P. Good luck.

ParrotChronicles.com

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